HPR

HPR!!! Well these three words mean an entire universe to me. I still remember the very first day that I laid my eyes on her. Dressed in salwar and acting all coy. I thought where did my dad arrange my marriage 😓. Little did I know that 6 months later I will be taking my wedding vows with her. Talking about my dad I don't know how many proposals he rejected, but the day he met this girl he was all gushing as to why she is the perfect choice for me. I was like how come one meeting and such impression. I was quite kicked to meet her.

Now off the topic a bit. There are two types of fragrances. One that will make an instant and quick impression while there are some that will mix in the air spreading the aroma gently taking you along with them. HPR was the second types. She was not gorgeous but she was beautiful, she was not hot but she was lovely, she was not breath taking but she was one who gave you a skip of heart beat. And then those brown eyes, the most lethal weapon she had. She did not need her lips to say any thing her eyes would convey every thing.

So then our train chugged along and we took the plunge on 11th July. I still remember her climbing those steps on to the stage, that lovely look and those shy smiles. HPR is some one who will not sweep you off your feet, she will just pull the rug beneath you. We met a lot before marriage like every other couple trying to strike the so called compatibility and it all culminated to the D-Day.

Now life after post marriage :-
I had heard horrible and terrible things  about marriage from married guys as to how you lose your freedom and all that. I am yet to experience those things. HPR is poles apart from me. HPR is the girl that every mother wants as a daughter and every mother in law as their daughter in law. The amazing way in which she blended within the family still astonishes me. The way she strikes balance between families is awesome even though being a working girl. I always thought what a big deal if a girl is working. But looking after how she manages I am glad I am a guy. I would have gone nuts. The way she takes care of people around her is simply astounding.

Now my equation with her. Plain and simple. I just love her and I won't compare my love to anything because I don't want to belittle her. She is beyond all comparisons. The way she gives a sideways smile makes me go week in the knees. When ever she is sleeping she looks so radiant that I cannot stop myself from giving a peck to her. She is my full hope my ambition my achievement and my strength.

I JUST LOVE YOU HPR.

THE BRIDGE

She didn’t mention. Yet he knew. Already.

The phone call wasn’t out of the blue. It was the daily routine late night call which refreshed her voice in his head. Some days they had lots of “important stuff” to tell each other while on other days, they had nothing to talk about. Yet the phone call was mandatory and every day he waited for the Cinderella hour impatiently.

Their story was pretty ordinary. They had met at the college canteen and got acquainted. But it was during a picnic that their love bloomed. He loved the bridge. It was small bridge over a man-made water body. It was there where they had first spent some time together. He always thought the bridge connected their souls. The bridge was the symbol of their love; it bridged two individuals into one soul.

But for the past two months, things were not as they used to be. He couldn’t put a finger on the exact change but he could feel it. His chubby-chirpy-cute cherub is as chubby and cute as she was yet the cheeriness has evaporated to unmask a cold crispiness. Though it scared him yet he was helpless. He wasn’t good at talking his heart out, or that is what he felt. So his calls became  more frequent and he started showering her with more gifts than ever.

There’s a limit. Though folks thought of her as a sensible sensitive sweet simpleton yet she had been harbouring a deep seated desire to become famous and rich. She did nothing half-heartedly, and worked towards fulfilling her dream. She didn’t believe in talking big and always let her actions speak louder. She has never been crazy romantic type but was not anti-romance either. So when love came calling, she let herself in the web of love. Her only fault was, she always let her heart do what it wanted but only after hearing out her brain.

Soon the romance began to take a toll on her. Instead of feeling the spring in her steps, she began to feel suffocated. She wanted to fly high and reach out to the sun. But he was bent on clipping her wings. He reminded her, the sun would burn her. Soon she began missing her old self; her smiles did not reach her eyes any more.

She had to make a decision. It was not easy to throw away a generous loving guy who was proud to present her to the world, one who called her his better half publicly. But he was clingy, emotionally needy and craved for her attention. All the time. Her presence, her voice made his ecstatic. Despite it all, he too deserved to be happy. How could one expect her to make him happy if she wasn’t happy herself?

They met at the bridge. One look at his face and she knew that he knew. It did not make anything easy for her. She owed him an explanation and she would give him one. Hence, the bridge.|
She said, “you are a very nice individual and so am i. Yes I am a good girl, believe it or not” and she paused trying to make the situation lighter, “but sometimes two nice individuals cannot form a nice symbiotic relationship. Remember how you equated this wooden bridge with our love? Yes it indeed is the symbol of our love. We are so different that we cannot be bridged together and if tried, it won’t be a strong one just as this bridge is not. Perhaps a pretty one but one whose foundation would shake too often. So why not part ways and lead happier lives?”
He sighed and said, “if you want to go, I won’t stop you but let me tell you you will never find anyone else like me”.

She kept mum. Her heart knew he was hurt and it let him feel he had the last words but it is her brain who had had retorted, “note to self: that is exactly the point, duh”.

THE SPEAKING OF THE SILENCE , THAT OUTSIDE LAUGH

                         After landing up in Mumbai I have made a lot of friends and reconnected with old ones and one such girl a college mate of mine (You can find her mention in some previous blog) . When she is herself she is so peppy, so full of life ki even those in depression will start dancing to her radiant and vibrant smile. But yes when she is sad and I can definitely make out when she is sad , it appears that its gloomy all around. Such is her aoura that seeing her laugh away at life we forget our problems. It may sound weird but she is the bestest drinking buddy I could ever imagine, no lafda sort of girl. Its like she gives a fuc**** balls to life, some one who lives her life on her terms.

                          So then why the hell I am concerned. Its not because of any connect, its because I have seen her through the various mood swings, her happiness, her sadness, her ups, her downs. But she always smiles even though she is in pain, and the worst part is when u realise that she is in pain and still cannot do any thing about it. You feel so helpless and one wishes that what to do to bring that gorgeous smile back on her face.(And it just doesn't help that I am fatally attracted to her roomie).

                          Perhaps some things still remains unsaid from her for some rhyme or reason. I want to tell her that if sorrow comes again and again , just draw a line in the sand and beyond that line make some thing else happen. Hurtful experiences in life make you either open up or shut down and she has shut down. It was so painful to see her lost in some myriad thoughts and still smiling through it. But I will suggest her that the braver choice is to open up to some one close who is your confidante. Some times in life you will do horrible shitty things that make you want to cringe and slap yourself over the head.So then what do you do ? You just turn around your perspective on life, you focus on the good stuff in order to bring around more good. Cmon babe just love yourself, you are just too good to be heart broken or sad for some dumb ass guy or situation. Trust me emotional trauma serves a purpose but if you are willing to see an opportunity in a terrible situation you are already on your way to healing.

                        Bottomline dear we just cannot stand the fact that you are sad and if you are just give a damn babe, you know the fact there is life beyond, there are friends beyond ( like your so hot and drooly roomie). So atleast for them keep that smile on your face ,you just don't know it gives lives to so many people, just dont take it away


P.S.- Sorry but for me your roomie is more beautiful :P (and I am fully drunk so ignore any mistakes :P)

TUL.....TUL

                          It just seems that Mumbai keeps springing back surprises in my life. And this weekend was no different. After like ages I came across one of the most lovely girls of my college here again in Mumbai and she immediately stuck us down with her humbleness and cheek in tongue smile. A girl who had an overflowing heart and soul rather than a puffed up ego , which the beautiful and successful girls always have. I was astonished the way she has changed. She was so full of life which reverberated in her smile. Yes she had changed but I was not complaining as she changed for better. I so very clearly remember the way she used to blast us off whenever we used to poke her during her headache times and may be that scare will always remain.(May be some thing she would have picked up from her roomie who is a live temper brigade).

                         So, we met up had lunch talked away to glory even though most of the place she and Lipu talked about I had never heard of. I was lost in my world thinking about the fact that may be I had the same confidence that this girl has, the same smartness she exudes yet be so humble and grounded and meet with your friends with the same fervor like in college and of course like a typical Bengali gorging on fish and rosogolla.

                         But then the latter half of the day was most surprising. She opened up about herself. I never thought as to why she gives a damn to what other people think. Pretty sure half of them will be jealous that she is not with them and the other half because they cant think of being with her just because she has a class of her own. But for we people she is a classmate, a friend for whom we still care irrespective of what has happened or what she has done because I know she has never done anything bad to me. Thats why she does not owe any explanation to any one. My be she should learn from certain things like below:-

Gham ke ye baadal guzar jaane de
Ab zindagi ko nikhar jaane de
Chhod de ab yaadon ke dukh sehnaa
Sun bhi le jo dil ka hai kehnaa
Jee le zaraa, jee le zaraa
Kehta hai dil jee le zaraa

 Cheers to her for a wonderful day , a day well spent with some memories etched for a long time to come .......

BAM BAM BAM BAMBAI (THE MUMBAI MANIA)

           Mumbai ........mm.....mmm .....the very word invokes images of bright lights , dynamic energy ,bustling lanes , popular corners, local trains and many more. And as it had to happen I did land in Mumbai and was immediately greeted by the heavy traffic and in the past one month there have been so many incidents that have forced me to salute the spirit of Mumbai and its people. Mumbai accepts everyone with open arms and once you land in its cradle , you see the wide variety of people cutting across all corners of India united by an invisible dying spirit. Mumbai has always picked itself up by its bootstraps and marched off to work after every big incident that threatened to mar that spirit.. It won't be wrong to say that one city that can give you an insight about the entire country is Mumbai (handsdown). 

                 Even the Mumbai sea reverberates tales of the thousands of love hungry, high on testosterone couples, the righteous rebels of the city, the keepers of faith in that word called ‘LOVE’. The euphoric dance of the sea, the symphonic orchestration of the waves lends them an outlet to emote, to sing their songs without fear, gives them that inexplicable strength in the heart, coaxing them, cajoling them to keep the romance alive at least at that tender, confusing and insouciant age of helplessness. The quite and secretive exchange of the waves and the stars at the horizon, the gentle breeze, the glancing into nothingness infuses that tingling happy feeling deep in the pit of the stomach. The sea has witnessed the swaying of lovingly held hands, many a promises made, many vows broken, many a tear drop being shed on its wet face. People like my BADE and CHOTEY sharing their heart out in Marine Drive probably the best amongst them.

                    More than as a place, its the people of Mumbai who infuse that sense of spirit amongst you. In my case right from my roommates to the people at work , everyone has taken that extra care walked that extra mile to make me feel comfortable. Starting with roommates BADE,CHOTE,MOTE (the three musketeers apart from me) are unique in their own sense. Life just seems so dull when they are not around. Their noise is like music to ears, incidents like IRISH HOUSE and SEVEN HILLS which are etched in my memory for ever (with that scar on CHOTE's head ). In fact it will be wrong to say that if BADE stops taking Blender's Pride and CHOTE stops using TATA DOCOMO, both of these companies will go bankrupt . The way BADE sleeps in installments in weekends and CHOTEY eats at nights is quite unique.

                People at work here are equally amazing. Manju maam like every lady so particular about cleanliness and taking care of everyone like MOM so much so that I dont even miss my MOM. RAJ sir or RATS sir (dont know what Manju maam calls him) is a workaholic which even puts us to shame. I think he should get a cot, mattress and pillow in office only.  Both of them like my roomies always take care of me a lot and make me feel at home. 

            I know my stay in Mumbai is going to be quite short but I think that I have already had memories that will never FADE..

THE DHN DILEMMA

 After a long time I thought of writing about my workplace (as it is really intriguing). So as it turned out I some how managed to successfully complete my Singapore project and was anxiously waiting for my new assignment. I flew back to Bangalore to our new office and was extremely happy to see my people grow leaps and bounds. I was once gain handed the Railway Team and my joy knew no bonds when they told me that next assignment of mine will be in my home town. My disappointment was greatly reduced.( I did not want to be back in my team but then home is home). So bags packed within the blink of eye and i landed in my home and was royally treated by mum's food.

Then the next day taking a walk down the memory lane i started for Dhanbad , the same dusty roads i used to take for my entrance exams. The case with Railways office in general is that they look in a very dilapidated condition from outside as if they would fall just with air blow but the fact is that inside the building, there are huge powerhouses who can turn on anything and who manage the largest employer of the world. And my good luck or bad luck whatever, I ran into two such power houses Sr.DFM and ADFM/II. I have always been a fan of the IRAS gang, not because they have different ideas but because they can make simple idea a wow idea within the blink of an eye. May be that separates these genius people from we ordinary people because they think out of the can, not because they are some super humans but due to the fact that, they stretch themselves to the maximum and are ever ready to burst out of the cocoon where in we ordinary people limit ourselves.

So, I was very happy that I got two such astounding supervisors who in every way made my job easy by showing me the way. But at the same way I was really astonished to see the extreme gap between the top level and middle level in Dhanbad. I have worked in quite a few Railway projects ranging from extra modern Western Railway to extremely less resourceful South Eastern Railway, but the so called gap , I had never seen at any place.I really want to make Dhanbad as one of the best , one which other Railways can envy, but sometimes I lose out my conviction and motivation after I interact with people here. May be there is a lot of inertia here but at the same time there are Newtons like Sr.DFM and ADFM/II to neutralize that. One session with these people, and you just get back your enthusiasm feeling all over the moon and ever ready to rock. I have never seen a Sr.DFM or a ADFM sit with me at 8 in the night or on weekends ensuring the correctness of the system. These people have literally slogged it out with me in their endeavour to make Dhanbad the best, but I know some where down the line the middle level and the lower level have to catch up to make this dream come reality. I just pray that before I go from here I can say that I was a part of this turn-around.

Bottomline is no one knows what the future is in store for me but for sure Dhanbad experience will be an ever lasting one.

THE B&T EFFECTS

So as it generally happens, was off to Kolkata ths weekend again escaping from the hectic work life of Dhanbad and trying to get back into the groove at 'CITY OF JOY'.  But there was a sense of anticipation this time, the eagerness to meet the tiger of our team, the guy who has taught us a lot and still we are learning from him. But to our surprise we had a beautiful surprise guest to go with the handsome hunk and man , did they make a couple ? Gorgeous,effervescent and charming duo and the first question stuck , they look so made for each other types, its like B was always made for T and vice versa.

Seeing them one is forced to believe that Love does not come with a tag of restrictions and limitations, it is an independent feeling that arises from within and is purely unconditional and boundless.The way they effortlessly communicate through their eyes is just awesome. Its like T is the oxygen which B is trying to breathe.Some people keeping looking for that perfect one all along but they have had themselves for each other all along. On seeing them one feels that their love will make them strong even on their weakest days.It is like one is not the half of two rather two of them are halves of one.One is cheese and the other maccaroni. Their love awakens our souls and brings calmness and peace to your minds. They just fit the bill, B & T making two broken pieces as one.Watching them i realized their every move and every touch and gesture made complete sense giving the completeness to the feeling of love between them. They are like the glue that hold their lives and faith in each other together, they have learnt to hang in and stay connected.They have a faith in their love and that strength and blessing is so large that it can carry them till eternity. No one is perfect in this world neither me nor B&T but its their combined flaws that allow two separate beings to hinge together. If conversation was the lyrics, laughter was the music, then they spending time together is a melody that could be replayed over and over without getting stale.

I have often wondered that how do relationships last and i guess i got some answers today. WIshing both of you a very happy union and lots of good life ahead. CHEERS TO B&T.